Reading Time: 3 minutes
Rachael Kirkconnell is ready to spill all the tea.
And, by the sound of it, Rachael Kirkconnell would to spill this scalding hot tea all over the head of ex-boyfriend Matt James.
Earlier this month, James announced on Instagram that he had split from his lover of four years.
He sounded pretty heartfelt at the time, too, while remaining vague and mysterious.
“Father God, give Rachael and I strength to mend our broken hearts,” James wrote as a message on January 16.
“Give us a peace about this decision to end our relationship that transcends worldly understanding.
“Shower our friends and family with kindness and love to comfort us. And remind us that our Joy comes from you, Lord.”
James met Kirkconnell met on The Bachelor, with the pair making it through a race-based controversy around that time that resulted from Rachael’s long-ago past.
For her part, Kirkconnell didn’t respond directly to the break-up right away, although she strongly hinted at some bitterness of what transpired.
Nearly two weeks after Matt’s announcement, though, the 28-year-old went on the Call Her Daddy podcast and sharied what led to the couple’s demise during a trip to Tokyo.
“He said that at the end of the day, there were just qualities about me that he worries about having in a wife,” she explained. “At the end of the day, [he said] there are things that we aren’t compatible with.”
It pretty clearly came out of nowhere to Kirkconnell, but she says that was consistent with the nature of the relationship.
“It was just one of those things where he, I think, just had this realization that, ‘I should want to propose to you by this time. At this point in our relationship, I should be wanting those things and I should be ready for that. But I’m not still.
“‘I still don’t feel like we’re ready, or I don’t feel like I’m ready. I don’t know if I ever see myself proposing to you. I can’t actually see myself married to you.’”
Kirkconnell added that she didn’t even know James would put out his Instagram statement until she saw it while on board an airplane.
“A few days before, we’re talking about how he feels lucky to have me as a partner,” Kirkconnell said of the unexpected decision.
“And that there’s so many qualities that he loves that I have and that we see relationships with other people where they deal with a lot or put up with a lot of things. And he’s like, ‘It’s just so nice that I just feel very lucky that I can call you my partner.’”
Overall, Rachael recalled that “everything was fine.” Until it wasn’t.
“It was just one of those things where [I] was like, ‘Do you want to make this work?” she said on the podcast. “‘Do you think that it’s me or is it something with you? Are you scared or is it really me? Is your perfect person somewhere out there? Is it not me?’
“And he came to the conclusion that he didn’t think it was me and he said he just didn’t want me to end up resenting him by wasting more of my time if it wouldn’t happen.”
